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I'm really torn on this bird thing. Every 12 hours I go back and forth between Barney the IRN (her info's here, though that's not a picture of her), and holding out for a GCC, even if that means going through a breeder. Last night my whole drive home I was thinking I wanted Barney, so I called my parents for advice.
Strangely for them, they weren't very helpful for the most part (my best friend afterwards said that could be b/c their cat is having health problems, so they could be thinking about his mortality and what they want in their next pet), instead of asking me probing questions that get to the heart of what I actually want, they were just telling me what they thought I should do. My mother told me I should get a sweet loving bird, that's what she'd want. My father said I should get a baby that would grow up with me and that I could mold into the perfect bird. (I'm not going to get into his idealism and whether or not that's realistic now.)
There was just one thing good that came out of my conversation with my Dad. He kept saying that I was too generous to want a rescued bird, too idealistic, and that I should be more selfish. He asked me whether, when I eventually have kids, if I'd want to adopt or have my own biological kids. And I replied "first one biological, second one adopted" - that's what I've thought for a while now, though I'd be fine with doing it differently. Dad: "Well, isn't having your own child kinda selfish? Why don't you do that with a bird?" Me: "Because I already was selfish with Peeper." I (with lots of help from my parents) did pick out Peeper. She was MY bird. But then I continued "I already did that with Peeper, but with Gabe I was entirely altruistic, accepting a bird that was dumped on my lap. If I wanted to be entirely selfless, I would've taken Piddle and Paddle. Now I'm looking for a compromise." So yeah, I ideally I do want a rescue bird that I choose.
And then I called my best friend JT b/c my parents weren't all that helpful. I feel a bit bad, I didn't even think to ask about her chocolate sales on V-day until the very end, but she didn't mind at all. She's awesome. ^_^ So, we talked forever as usual, but what came out of it is that she thinks I should go for a conure. Her reasoning is twofold: every since she met me, less than a year before I got Peeper, whenever we visited a petstore she says I gravitated straight towards the larger louder bolder birds, be they cockatoos or macaws. She feels it's always been my dream to have an outgoing bird, and while I might be satisfied with less, it's not what would make me happiest.
And second, she asked me "Could you have lived with another bird like Peeper for another 50 years?" My reply was "Of course I could, it's a lifetime commitment so if I did get Barney no matter what I would love her and care for her forever. But I might get bored and need to get a second bird that was more lively. If T$ would allow that." My reply wasn't "Of course I'll love her forever PERIOD." It was "I'm a responsible person so I'll do what I have to do, but I don't think it'll satisfy me and I'll have to get that elsewhere."
So for this 12-hour period I'm thinking conure. JT pointed out that even if I go with a breeder it will take time to find a good breeder that has a clutch ready for me or on its way, so it doesn't hurt to start looking now, and if in the meantime a rescue gets in a good bird for me, it's not like I committed to the breeder so I could get that bird instead. (But Barney talks! It's so cute!) (But talking isn't the most important characteristic in a bird, it's just a bonus on top of a bird if I already like him/her. I can't save them all.) And I'm hoping to spend some time with![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
rumorofrain's caiques in the meantime too so I can get some firsthand experience with the delight and mania that is a playful bird. If I really do decide that's not for me, I can turn around and back out and get Barney or a similar bird, but if it entrances me, I know what to do.
Okay, now it's time to go to work.Maybe I'll stop by the Crystal Parrot on my way home I will not! If I do I'll just want to buy a dozen babies.
Strangely for them, they weren't very helpful for the most part (my best friend afterwards said that could be b/c their cat is having health problems, so they could be thinking about his mortality and what they want in their next pet), instead of asking me probing questions that get to the heart of what I actually want, they were just telling me what they thought I should do. My mother told me I should get a sweet loving bird, that's what she'd want. My father said I should get a baby that would grow up with me and that I could mold into the perfect bird. (I'm not going to get into his idealism and whether or not that's realistic now.)
There was just one thing good that came out of my conversation with my Dad. He kept saying that I was too generous to want a rescued bird, too idealistic, and that I should be more selfish. He asked me whether, when I eventually have kids, if I'd want to adopt or have my own biological kids. And I replied "first one biological, second one adopted" - that's what I've thought for a while now, though I'd be fine with doing it differently. Dad: "Well, isn't having your own child kinda selfish? Why don't you do that with a bird?" Me: "Because I already was selfish with Peeper." I (with lots of help from my parents) did pick out Peeper. She was MY bird. But then I continued "I already did that with Peeper, but with Gabe I was entirely altruistic, accepting a bird that was dumped on my lap. If I wanted to be entirely selfless, I would've taken Piddle and Paddle. Now I'm looking for a compromise." So yeah, I ideally I do want a rescue bird that I choose.
And then I called my best friend JT b/c my parents weren't all that helpful. I feel a bit bad, I didn't even think to ask about her chocolate sales on V-day until the very end, but she didn't mind at all. She's awesome. ^_^ So, we talked forever as usual, but what came out of it is that she thinks I should go for a conure. Her reasoning is twofold: every since she met me, less than a year before I got Peeper, whenever we visited a petstore she says I gravitated straight towards the larger louder bolder birds, be they cockatoos or macaws. She feels it's always been my dream to have an outgoing bird, and while I might be satisfied with less, it's not what would make me happiest.
And second, she asked me "Could you have lived with another bird like Peeper for another 50 years?" My reply was "Of course I could, it's a lifetime commitment so if I did get Barney no matter what I would love her and care for her forever. But I might get bored and need to get a second bird that was more lively. If T$ would allow that." My reply wasn't "Of course I'll love her forever PERIOD." It was "I'm a responsible person so I'll do what I have to do, but I don't think it'll satisfy me and I'll have to get that elsewhere."
So for this 12-hour period I'm thinking conure. JT pointed out that even if I go with a breeder it will take time to find a good breeder that has a clutch ready for me or on its way, so it doesn't hurt to start looking now, and if in the meantime a rescue gets in a good bird for me, it's not like I committed to the breeder so I could get that bird instead. (But Barney talks! It's so cute!) (But talking isn't the most important characteristic in a bird, it's just a bonus on top of a bird if I already like him/her. I can't save them all.) And I'm hoping to spend some time with
rumorofrain's caiques in the meantime too so I can get some firsthand experience with the delight and mania that is a playful bird. If I really do decide that's not for me, I can turn around and back out and get Barney or a similar bird, but if it entrances me, I know what to do. Okay, now it's time to go to work.
