The most confusing reporting ev4r!

[asterroc]

So this policeman's had the charge of killing a teen who stole a Playstation accidentally dismissed. Yes, my grammar's horrible and makes the situation hard to understand. The article's worse. (Ugh, and every single sentence is a separate paragraph! No wonder our students can't write.)

Now that you're done reading it, here's my re-write that tells the story somewhat more chronologically. Numbers at the beginning of sentences indicate where the sentence originally appeared. Some sentences are kinda overlaps, or refer to multiple times, but rather than editing the sentences I simply changed the order, and when in doubt I underline the phrase that I used to order the sentence.

RALEIGH, North Carolina (AP) --

18) Authorities had accused Peyton Strickland and two friends of beating a student at the University of North Carolina at Wilmington and robbing him of two PlayStation 3s, which have been in high demand since going on sale last month.

5) Police suspected the teen stole two Sony PlayStation 3 video game consoles from a college student in Wilmington. (Read the full story about the shooting)

20a) Police believed they would be at risk when serving the search warrant, and used a police battering ram to break down the door.

22) David said Monday that Long believed he heard gunfire when the battering ram hit the door. Other officers, who did not fire, said they did not hear gunfire.

23) "He based his decision on his law enforcement training," McGuinness said Tuesday. "The fact that he shot was not a mistake. It was based on his belief that he was being fired upon."

4) David said the sheriff's deputy opened fire as police raided the home of 18-year-old Peyton Strickland.

20b) Long opened fire, hitting the unarmed Cape Fear Community College student in the head and near his right shoulder, an autopsy found.

21) Police also shot and killed Strickland's dog.

19) The friends, Braden Riley and Ryan Mills, have pleaded not guilty.

3) Monday New Hanover County District Attorney Ben David had announced Cpl. Christopher Long, 34, would face a second degree murder charge.

2) A grand jury foreman said he had checked the wrong box on the indictment paperwork, triggering the dismissal.

6) The grand jury foreman told a court Tuesday that he checked the wrong box on the indictment form by mistake, according to an order signed Tuesday by Superior Court Judge Ernest Fullwood.

8) A copy of the indictment filed as evidence Tuesday shows a check next to "true bill" indictment, with a heavy mark made through "not a true bill," followed by what appears to be the foreman's initials and Tuesday's date.

9) When a grand jury wants a murder indictment, it returns a "true bill." When it decides it does not want to issue an indictment, it returns "not a true bill."

10) "It was the kind of mistake you and I make in the world of forms," said Long's attorney, Mike McGuinness. "We check the wrong boxes."

1) Officials dismissed a murder charge Tuesday against a sheriff's deputy accused of shooting and killing an unarmed teenager who authorities believed had stolen video game consoles.

7) The foreman learned about the mistake after other jury members heard about it from media reports.

11) The development drew a quick reaction from Strickland's family, which demanded an investigation.

12a) "Yesterday, our son's murderer was going to have to answer for what he did," Don and Kathy Strickland said in a statement. "Today, we just don't know what is going on in Wilmington. We are upset, confused and searching for answers."

13) David said in a news release Tuesday that everyone in the court system believed the grand jury had indicted Long, a 12-year member of the sheriff's office who was fired last week after the December 1 shooting.

14) Attorney general's office officials were to meet with David on Tuesday morning to "evaluate all options," David said.

15) It was not clear whether the error would prevent prosecutors from refiling charges against Long, a 12-year member of the sheriff's office who was fired last week after the shooting.

16) McGuinness said there is no need for prosecutors to reconsider the case because the grand jury has already "made a substantial decision" not to charge Long with murder.

17) The only mistake was in reporting that decision, he said.

Comments

[the1hobbit.livejournal.com]

is it sad the kid who stole the PS3's shares my last name? I think so!!!!