this is not a journal title

I warn you, this post could be trigger-y for some people.

Sometimes I try to explain to men that women have an entirely different experience of life because we are habitually victims. We have to look over our shoulders. We have to worry if the guy asking us directions is planning to rape us. We can't go out at night, or constantly fear assault if we do. It's absolutely horrible, and it makes me want to slap the guys who don't understand and say that we're no more likely to be victimized than men, or worse, that it's our own faults for not fighting back when we are victimized.

Take the latest Savage Love column for example.

( Quoted here for posterity or if you don't like links )

It's just horrible. Not only was this woman raped, but now her own beloved boyfriend is saying it wasn't rape and she cheated on him! This woman had the choice to gouge her attacker's eyes out, or to be raped, and her boyfriend is blaming her because she "chose" the rape?! Fuck. She didn't even feel she had the choice to gouge his eyes out, b/c of societal pressure to not be a bad girl like that. Ugh. This makes me too disgusted for words.